I have to go back on my anxiety medication, I can’t go without it. I’m suffering too much, the depression and cravings are crippling. I was so happy when the doctor said I could come off of it, but it was just a trial and it didn’t go well so I have to go back on it.
But that doesn’t make me weak.
I have a chemical imbalance which causes me to feel the extreme emotions that I do, it causes me to have irrational thoughts and fears, it causes me to crave things that I shouldn’t. And because of that, I need medication.
It’s taken me a very long time to realize that it’s okay to be on medicine for these ailments. I always thought it was a sign of weakness to take a pill for something, like just suck it up, I’ll be fine. But that’s not the case. I can not function without it. Heck, I can barely function with it. It’s a good day if I even get out of bed to shower. To some, that will sound gross and unclean, but others will fully understand where I’m coming from.
Weakness does not come in the form of taking your medications like you’re supposed to, weakness comes in the form of giving up. If you choose to stop taking your meds, stop fighting those demons, stop praying, stop talking to God, stop going to those meetings or therapy sessions; that’s weakness.
Strength is found in each of us in different ways.
My strength is that I cry instead of cutting myself, that I drink coffee instead of giving in to the urges that tell me to drink alcohol, that I pray to God to save me from myself instead of acting upon the depression.
What about you? What are your strengths?
Look at yourself from an outsider’s point of view and see what they see. Maybe you’re strength is that you get up out of bed each day at 8 am even though you want to sleep all day because of the depression. Or maybe you go to those meetings every night instead of taking that first sip of alcohol. Or it could be that you call the suicide hotline when you’re feeling like taking your own life. Those are strengths and everybody has strengths.
Tell me some of your strengths in the comments!