An Open Letter To The Active Addict

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Hi, my name is Lindsey and I am an addict.

I don’t know what you are struggling with, but I want you to know that I once was you. I, too, have intoxicated myself with substances to feel alive, to lose all feeling and to forget. While I have never tried hard drugs, I know what addiction feels like; I am an alcoholic in recovery.

I know what it is like to get those cravings, the ones that are just insatiable and feel like you are going to explode if you don’t get your fix. I know what it’s like to go through withdrawals if you run out of your drug of choice. I know that you think intoxication is the only way to silence the demons that just won’t leave you alone. I know what it’s like to want to die because you feel like such a screw-up and you feel like you aren’t worth anything.

Alcohol may not compare to your “drug,” but I can at least relate. Addiction is ugly no matter what you’re using. Addiction makes you lose sight of your goals and dreams. Addiction takes you to a place in your mind that nobody knows exists. Addiction makes you apathetic to everyone but yourself.

Drugs and alcohol take away your freedom, they take away your friends and they take away your family. And, honestly, you most likely won’t realize it til it’s almost too late. People probably try to tell you that you aren’t the same or that you need to change, but you just don’t see anything wrong with your life choices. You think that you’re more than capable of living your life and you get mad at the thought of having a “problem.” “I know what I’m doing, I just do it for fun, I’m not going to ruin my life.” Yeah, sure you’re not. Don’t you know that you are already on a path to self destruction?

Addiction hurts, so freaking bad. It hurts you, whether you realize it or not. And it hurts those who love and care for you. Think about your mom, your dad, your little brother or sister. How do you think they feel when they see you suffering from this horrible disease?

“My son/daughter just stopped calling, I don’t know if I’m one night going to get a knock on my door saying that they overdosed or drank theirself to death.”

“Why doesn’t my brother/sister come see me anymore? Do they not love me?”

Active addiction disguises itself as this glorious, fun time out with friends or even just having a “chill sesh” by yourself. The truth hurts, it hurts like hell. Addiction is the ugliest, slow killer that I have ever seen. And I am a victim of it. I know how much you probably hate yourself right now and how much you probably hate me. I know how bad it hurts to read this, and honestly it hurts me to write it.

But I want you to know that you don’t have to suffer in silence anymore, there is hope for you.

All it takes is you, you just have to admit to yourself that you have a problem. And that is the absolute hardest thing you will ever have to do.

I know you, you’re not a bad person. You’ve just fallen and need help getting back up. Don’t let the purpose of this letter go unserved. Go out and seek help, it’s all around you. All you have to do is take that first step and tell yourself that you need help. Nobody will judge you, I know that’s what you’re worried about. Think of how happy your family, your friends, but most importantly how happy you will be once you’re no longer a slave to addiction.

Just take that first step, I know you can do it. You’re worth it. You’ve always been worth it. Don’t let this disease take you down, you’re so much stronger than that!

I want you to know that I am here for you, I want you to get help. I want you to be the person that you’ve dreamed of. You’ve got this. Don’t give up, I have faith in you, even if you’ve lost faith in yourself.

xoxo
Lindsey

Check out my personal accomplishments in sobriety here!

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17 Comments Add yours

  1. ellenbest24 says:

    In my experience Alcohol is a hard drug. Alcohol is so ready available people are not ashamed to be seen buying it, selling or using it. That makes it far too easy, families are ashamed of the alchoholic and hide it they enable it which in turn allows it to continue, spiral out of control.
    Why wouldn’t the alcoholic have one more when there are all these things making it easy to do.
    I applaud your strength and courage and give you a *standing ovation* .
    Today you are sober and today you help others to rise above. You hold out a hand which takes strength and say ‘I will listen’. If only one person is helped you will have done an enormous thing.

    I am the remnants of a person, of a life that was left broken, I’m a person who tried for twenty eight years to mend the man drowning in alcohol. Alcohol wrecks lives, breaks spirits, smashes family and trust. Alcohol destroys all that is good and systamatically drowns the person leaving something less than a human in it’s place.
    Good post! Good luck,.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for your kind words!! And your comment is so informative, I love it!! Thank you for sharing 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

      1. ellenbest24 says:

        You are welcome. Do come and peek at my blog. I have stories, poems, song, humor, fantasy and if you look close… pieces of me. I never write about alcohol or the perpetrator of pain as he is my childrens Father. But do come put your feet up and chill. 😇

        Liked by 2 people

      2. I will do that!! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      3. ellenbest24 says:

        You will be made welcome, shall I put the kettle on. 😜

        Liked by 2 people

  2. Janice Wald says:

    Hi,
    My daughter is struggling with similar issues. It is not drugs. I can relate to what you wrote.
    Congratulations on being Danny Ray’s featured blogger. I was his featured blogger too! Maybe you can check out my blog if you need a blogging tip or two. That’s what I write about.
    Janice

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you!! I’ll Def check out your blog because I’m really new to it and can use as many tips as possible!!

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Janice Wald says:

        I will look forward to your visit.
        Janice

        Liked by 2 people

  3. Hi Lindsey, I’m Melinda, and I’m a recovered alcoholic as well.
    Thank you for this letter. I’m sitting here crying, tears rolling down my cheeks. I still remember the agony. I’m sure I’ll never be able to forget.
    Sobriety is such a wonderful gift we gave ourselves, and our whole world.
    Thank you for following me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are so welcome! Sobriety is the best gift I have received, it is so freeing!! And you are so welcome for the follow!! Thank you for reading my Open Letter!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes, it is indeed!
        You’re welcome. Except for the F bombs, I really enjoyed reading it, because I could relate, and because I felt your heart.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Sorry about those! I’m trying to stay away from them but I do tend to have a potty mouth at times 😡

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Thank you. I feel like such a school marm, when I mention them, but they really bother me.

        Liked by 1 person

      4. I understand!!!

        Liked by 1 person

  4. msw blog says:

    what a powerful honest open letter!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much!!

      Like

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